Risk Taking
by KBRC2316
Summary: Before 47 Seconds. Castle finally takes the risk and asks Beckett out on a date.
1. Chapter 1

_**Hey guys! I am so so so sorry for my lack of presence! I got a new laptop and it took me forever to download Microsoft word on it. Plus, I hadn't been inspired much lately. I know I said I would be writing a sequel to one of my other stories called "Those Three Words", but again I hadn't had much inspiration to continue that...FOR NOW! I might come back to it later! **_

_**Anyways, I started a new story; although I don't know how long it will be yet. This story takes place during season 4 but before "47 Seconds". I hope you like it! :) **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Castle**_

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Today is the day. Today is the day Richard Castle finally gets some courage and asks Kate Beckett out on an official date. Lately things have been great between them. Their flirty banter has increased, and there has been more and more lingering touches and gazes. She's being more open with him, he can tell. He can practically see those bricks on her wall falling one by one.  
After having a constant self debate over the past week, he has finally chosen to take a chance and ask her out.

Beckett is sitting at her desk at 9:30am with no murder, just paperwork. She was already bored out of her mind, and it wasn't even lunch yet. She wished Castle would get here already and keep her company. Her and Castle's relationship has progressed very well during the past few months. She's been working on being more open with him. She knows for certain that she wants to be with him, it's just working on her being ready for a man as wonderful as Rick Castle. Lately she's been thinking that maybe if they just take that last step in starting a new chapter of their relationship, then maybe it will be exactly what she needs to knock down those last few bricks. She knows that their relationship is waiting on her to be ready and she will most likely have to make the first move. But she kind of wishes that Castle would just go for it and take that final step for her.

Her thoughts are then interrupted by the ding of the elevator, and out strolls the man who has invaded her thoughts for the past 15 minutes.

"Morning Beckett, how's it going?" Castle asks, while handing her the second cup of coffee he's holding and offering that smile he only reserves for their daily coffee exchange.

"Hey Castle, thanks!" She says, nodding at the coffee and giving him her own specially reserved smile. "It's been alright, no murder, just paperwork, unfortunately."

"Hm, well that's not always a bad thing" Castle says while taking a seat in his chair.

"Really? And since when have you become a fan of paperwork?" She replies, setting her coffee down and folding her hands across her desk.

"Well uhh... There's an advantage of letting you get home at a decent hour." Castle says nervously. "Like today, if there's no murder and you're not busy later on, I was wondering if, uhm...you'd like to go out for dinner with me tonight?" Castle says quickly, avoiding her eyes.

Kate smiled beautifully, eyes shining. _Finally!,_ was all she could think. She looked at him, he was looking at his lap, playing with his hands nervously.

"Castle?" She says gently, to get his attention. When he finally meets her eyes, she continues with a smile. "I'd love to have dinner with you."

He gives a smile that has his eyes crinkling at the side and it's hard for her not to mirror his face.

"Yeah? So tonight at 8pm work for  
you?" Castle asks excitedly.

"It's perfect." She replies, reaching for his hand across her desk and squeezing it lightly.

Castle leaves after lunch, to finalize things for their date tonight. Which leaves Kate to finish up paperwork until 5:30pm.

Kate gets home at 6pm and immediately jumps into the shower. She then goes to her closet to pick an outfit to wear. She chooses a royal blue thick strapped dress, that crosses at the back, and stops just above her knees. She picks a pair of black wedges to accompany the dress. She then goes on to start her hair. She decides to keep it down with loose curls. She applies a bit of foundation, eyeliner, mascara, and eyeshadow. By the time she finishes her hair, makeup, slips on her dress and shoes, and grabs a small black purse, it's 8:00pm and she hears a knock on her door. She takes one last look in the mirror and heads for the door.

When she opens the door, she's met with a pair of sea blue eyes and a truly happy smile.

"Hey Castle" she says softly.

"Hi, uh, these are for you" he replies while handing her a bouquet of assorted flowers.

"Oh Castle, thank you! They're beautiful." She says while taking the flowers.

"So are you" Castle replies automatically.

She suddenly looks up at him and he stutters.

"I..uh..I mean, you, uhm..."

Kate just laughs softly, "thank you Castle. You don't look too bad yourself." She replies while letting her eyes rack over his outfit.

He's wearing a black suit, with a royal blue shirt that coincidentally matches hers and brings out his eyes, accompanied by a black tie.

"Please come inside." She says, stepping back. "Just let me find a vase to put these in."

He steps in while she goes off to the kitchen. She returns quickly, and they're off. When they're seated in Castle's car service, Kate asks,

"So where are we having dinner?"

"Well that, my dear detective, is a secret." Castle replies with a wink.

When they arrive at the restaurant, Castle steps out of the car and helps Kate out. She loops her arm with his and they make their way to the entrance. It's a cute italian place, not too crowded. The waiter leads them to a room at the back of the restaurant, away from others, and it's decorated beautifully with a single table in the middle.

Kate stops and gasps. "Castle...it's beautiful!"

"Well you deserve the best." Castle says easily with a smile.

Kate squeezes his forearm and gives him a smile of her own in response.

He leads her to the table with his hand on the small of her back. He pulls out her chair and allows her to sit before taking his own seat across the table.

They both order different types of pasta and a bottle of wine. Their dinner progresses while having a constant conversation, sharing food, handholding, and sharing gazes into each others eyes. They order a lava cake to share for dessert and after they're done, they find themselves pleasantly stuffed.

"Would you like to go for a walk?" Castle asks

"I would like that" Kate replies

So they make their way outside with no destination in mind. Castle offered her his suit jacket because of the slight breeze outside. They end up walking hand in hand for about 30 minutes or so until they find themselves in front of Kate's apartment.

Castle walks her up to her door, not wanting the night to end. They arrive to her front door and instead of Kate opening it, she turns around to face Castle.

"I had a wonderful time Rick, thank you." Kate says smiling at him and squeezing their still joined hands.

"Me too, Kate." Castle replies.

"Look, I would invite you in for coffee, but it's already really late and we have an early start tomorrow morning, so..." Kate rambles off nervously.

Castle chuckles. "Hey, Kate. Don't worry, it's fine, I understand." He says and smiles. "But uhm..." He starts a bit nervous himself. "Next time maybe we could have a night in at the loft? I'll cook dinner and we can watch a movie maybe? I mean if you want there to be a next time... It's just that I...I had a great time and would love to do it again, but if you can't then I completely..."

He was cut off by Kate's lips on his. He was about to respond back but Kate pulled away much too quickly for his liking. When she leaned back to look at him, her hands on his shoulders, she smiled at him.

"You talk too much, you know that?" She said with a smirk. Before he could reply, she continued. "But a night at the loft sounds great! Is tomorrow good for you? We won't have to worry about it getting late since I have the next day off."

Castle nodded, still a bit dazed from their kiss. "Tomorrow is perfect."

She nodded back and smiled.  
"Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow then. Goodnight Castle."

He didn't respond. He just pulled her in for another kiss. He wrapped his arms around her waist and she wrapped her arms around his neck. They kissed for a few minutes until he pulled back and rested his forehead against hers.

"Night Kate." He said softly, giving her one last peck on her lips before turning around and going. Leaving Kate in front of her door with a ridiculously big smile plastered on her face. She couldn't wait for tomorrow!

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_**That's chapter 1! Let me know what you of it so far! :)** _


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thanks for all the follows/favourites/reviews! I really appreciate it!**_

_**This is the next chapter! Hope you guys enjoy it :)!** **Sorry for any mistakes!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Castle**_

* * *

It was 5:30pm on Friday and Kate was just stepping on the elevator in the Precinct to leave. Again, there were no cases today, just more paperwork. Majority of the day was a bore, except when Castle popped in around lunch. However, he left right after to get things ready at the loft for their date.

Kate couldn't wait for tonight, it was all she could think about today. Well that, and how amazing Castle's lips felt against hers. She still couldn't believed they kissed. Their first time wasn't in anyway worse, but this time they didn't have to pretend or forget about it and move on. They were able to move forward together.

When she arrived at her apartment, there wasn't much for her to do. She took a quick shower and changed into more casual and comfortable clothes. She opted for a pair of dark blue jeans, a plain white tank top and a green cardigan to go over. Once she was all dressed, she put on a pair of black flats and left her apartment.

About 15 minutes later, Castle heard a knock at his door. He opened it and was met with a beautiful smile from his very own detective.  
"Hey Kate, come on in." Castle said with a big smile on his face.

"Hey Castle, thanks." Kate replied. She looked him over, he was wearing a pair of jeans and a black v-neck t shirt. She was still amazed at the size of his biceps and chest. His usual dress shirt and jacket didn't do him justice.

Castle led her over to the kitchen after she put her bag down and took off her shoes. He couldn't help notice how relaxed she looked in her outfit, not to mention how the green cardigan brought out her forest green eyes.

"Would you like a glass of wine?" Castle offered.

"Yeah, red would be great, thanks." Kate said.

While handing her a glass of wine, Castle began. "So I was thinking. Since we did fancy yesterday, I thought it'd be nice to do more laid back today...if that's okay?"

"Yeah, that sounds perfect! What did you have in mind?" Kate asked.

"I thought it would be fun to make a pizza together. You can choose toppings for one half and I'll choose toppings for the other half." Castle suggested.

"Great! Let's get started, shall we?" Kate replied excitedly.

About 20 minutes later, the pizza was put in the oven. It took longer that necessary, because Castle acted like a little kid wanting to put as much as possible on his half of the pizza, not forgetting extra, extra cheese. Kate went for a more simple pizza. She stuck with mushrooms, cheese, peppers, and sausage.

"While the pizza is baking, how about we choose a movie?" Asked Castle.

"Sure. What movies do you have?"

"Feel free to take a look. They're by the projector. I'm just gonna get the snacks ready." Castle said as he made his way back to the kitchen.

Kate looked over his collection of movies...he had a lot. But there was a movie that stood out. It was one of her favourites, a classic romantic comedy, The Princess Bride. She had always loved the movie, ever since she was a kid.

She inserted the movie and made her way back to Castle.  
"Is the pizza almost ready?" She asked as she took a sip of her wine.

"Just about. A few more minutes or so. What kind of movie candy do you like?" Castle asked, while laying out the options on the counter.

"Mmm, definitely Malteser's!" Kate said, eying the candy.

"Good choice detective. They happen to be my favourite too." Castle replied with a wink.

Kate blushed and looked down; however, when she met his eyes, they stood there just gazing at each other, as they so often do. But they were interrupted by the ding of the oven, indicating the pizza was ready.

Once they each helped themselves to the pizza, they made their way over to the couch with pizza, popcorn, Malteser's, and wine in their hands. They settled themselves on the couch, side by side as Castle picked up the remote and clicked play.

"So what movie did you choose?" He asked, when he realized she didn't mention it.

"You'll just have to wait and see, writer boy." Kate replied with a smirk.

"Writer man, Kate...MAN!" Castle emphasized.

"Well I'm not convinced yet." Kate said.

And then Castle leaned in and whispered in a low and rough voice. "Oh, trust me. I _will_ convince you detective."

Kate blushed immensely and looked away while Castle sat there with a smug look on his face.

They soon finished their pizza and picked up the snacks. Castle held the bowl of popcorn and Kate held a bowl of Malteser's.

Castle had just shoved a handful of popcorn in his mouth, when Kate startled him.

"Wait! You have to try the popcorn and a malteser together!" Kate insisted and before she could even think of what she was doing, she popped a malteser into his mouth. Right after she fed him it, she realized what she had done. But before she pulled her hand away, she felt Castle's tongue dart out between his lips and swirl it around her finger.

The movie was well forgotten. The air seemed to have thicken and it suddenly got really hot.

Kate glanced to Castle and noticed his eyes had darkened, and she knew her eyes matched his. The arousal that had quickly built up within her in the matter of seconds was unbelievable.

Before she could even think another thing, she felt Castle's eager lips on hers. When she snapped out of her daze, she responded back, just as hungrily.

They continued to kiss. Castle running his tongue along the seam of her lips for her to open. She gladly obliged and both tongues wandered. Somehow they managed to place the popcorn and candy on the table without anything spilling. Once their hands were free, Castle's hands found their way to her hips and she ran her fingers through his hair at the nape of his neck, pulling him closer.  
Castle stood up and placed a knee in between her legs and leaned forward so that she was forced to fall back on the couch.

Castle hovered over Kate. One hand still on her hip, but now under her shirt, and the other hand was beside her head on the couch to keep himself up so he wouldn't crush her.

Kate had wrapped one leg around Castle's and pulled him even closer as her hands made their way up his chest, under his shirt.

Moans were heard from both Castle and Kate, but neither could tell whose belonged to whom.

Before things progressed to far, Castle pulled back and looked at her.  
"Kate...are you sure?"

Kate bit her lip and nodded.  
"Take me to bed, Rick." She whispered.

Castle didn't need to be told twice. He got up with her so she had her arms and legs wrapped around him and continued to kiss her while he made his way to his bedroom.

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**_Let me know what you think! :)_**


	3. Chapter 3

_**I'm really liking all the reviews guys! Thanks so much :) This is the next chapter, it's kind of short, sorry :/ **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Castle :(**_

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Kate woke up at around 8am due to her body's internal clock. When she was finally able to focus, she took in her unusual surroundings. She first noticed she was in a much larger room with different furniture around the place. Then she took in the sinfully soft mattress and smooth sheets she was sleeping on. Lastly she became aware of the arm that was splayed over her waist.

She carefully turned on her other side and saw Richard Castle, hair sticking up and face smushed into the pillow, laying beside her. Memories from last night/early morning flooded her mind and a wide smile appeared on her face.

They slept together. After almost 4 years, they finally slept together. In the beginning of their partnership, there was no doubt that there was a physical attraction between the two of them, so at first she thought that a one night stand would be inevitable for them. But once they really got to know each other, she realized that wasn't going to be an option. Sleeping together once then forgetting would be impossible for her, especially after how amazing last night was. She always knew sex with Castle would be good, but she didn't expect it to be _that_ good! But it was her and Castle, they had this special connection which made everything between them better, different, and exciting.

When she finally snapped out of her thoughts she realized she had been staring at Castle's adorable sleeping face while thinking about them. _Ugh gosh, she was already turning into a sap._ But if she was being honest, she could care less. She was finally with the man she always wanted to be with, after denying her feelings for years. Her heart soared with the thought and she felt a weird fluttering feeling in her stomach.

She reached out and played with the short hairs that dangled from his forehead before carefully running her fingers through his unbelievably soft head of hair. Something she had always wanted to do.

A few moments later, he began to stir and his eye lids started fluttering. He opened his eyes for a few seconds, taking the beautiful detective in, before closing them again. Then a smile appeared on his face as his arm tightened around her waist and pulled her closer to him.

"Mm, wha' time s'it?" Castle mumbled into the pillow.

"Just after 8am." Kate replied, smiling at how adorable he was in the morning.

Castle then turned over from his stomach to his side so he was facing her, then pulled her even closer to him. He rested his head on his bicep while he played with the strands of her hair that spread across her pillow, and buried his face into her neck.

"Why must you wake up so early?" Castle half mumbled, and half grumbled into her neck.

Kate laughed and Castle felt the vibrations through her body which made him smile.

"Sorry, it's part of the job description." Kate replied while smiling and still running her hands through his hair.

"Well you're off today, so go back to sleep." Castle said.

"Mm, I can't. You see, I feel unusually energized this morning." Kate said slyly.

Castle eyes opened immediately.  
"Oh really? Well I know a few ways you could use that energy of yours." He said while he began to kiss her neck.

Kate let out a shaky breath, but managed to speak.  
"Slow down there mister. I think you owe me breakfast before round two."

"Well technically, it would be round four." Castle said as he kissed his way up her neck to her jaw and cheek.

"In that case... It better be a damn good breakfast!" Kate said.

Castle laughed and lifted his head up to look at her.  
"Well my dear detective, you make quite a convincing argument. However, I do believe you are forgetting one thing."

"Oh really? And what might that be?" Kate asked with raised eyebrows.

"This." Castle simply stated and closed the distance between them to kiss her.

Their lips did a slow and gentle dance; much like the kiss after their first date.

After they pulled away, they rested their foreheads together trying to catch their breaths. After a few moments, Castle spoke.

"Good morning." He said softly and leaned in to give her a quick peck on the lips.

"Mmm, I could definitely get used to waking up every morning like that." Kate hummed.

"Well I'll make sure not to disappoint you then. But now I gotta get some food in my girls stomach." Castle said while getting up.

"Your girl?" Kate challenged, with a glare and one eyebrow raised.

Castle froze. Eyes wide and slowly turning back towards her.  
"I...uh..meant. I mean...I guess I assumed..." He stopped when he heard Kate chuckle.

"Rick, relax." Kate said while grabbing one of his hands with hers. "I was joking. Besides..." She trailed off while getting up and making her way towards him, wearing just Castle's black v-neck t-shirt from last night. She stood in front of him and laced her arms around his neck. "...I like being called 'your girl'." She said, giving him a specially reserved smile and leaning in to press her lips against his.

"Mm, and I love calling you that. Now I am going to make myself worthy of calling you that by cooking you breakfast." He said and without warning, picked her up bridal style and started out the door.

Kate let out a squeal and a laugh, holding on to him tightly...not that he minded.

* * *

Castle took them to the kitchen and placed her down on top of the counter, perpendicular to the stoves.

He stood in between the V of her legs and placed both hands either side of her, on the counter.  
"Now what does my beautiful girlfriend want to eat?" Castle said, smiling sweetly at her.

Kate blushed and looked down.  
"Hmm, I do remember someone once telling me that pancakes were a way of saying 'thank you so much for last night'."

Castle smiled widely. "My pleasure." He said, turning around to get the ingredients. But Kate grabbed his forearm to stop him.  
"Castle?"

"Mhmm?" He replied with his eyebrows raised in question.

"Coffee is also a way into a girls heart." She said coyly, looking up at him through hooded eyelashes.

Castle let out a loud laugh and immediately went to kiss her. He pulled back, still smiling.  
"God, I love you." He said before he fully registered the words coming out of his mouth.

Castle froze and he looked at Kate with wide eyes.  
"Kate, I mean..." But she interrupted him before he could say anything else.

"Castle, it's okay. I know." She said softly.

"Rea- Wait you know? How...?" He asked carefully.

Kate paused and took a deep breath, then looked at him in the eyes.

"I remember, Castle. I remember everything..."

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_**Ouuuu sorry about the cliff hanger! I'll try to update soon, but I'm leaving for my cottage tomorrow so I make no promises. Anyways let me know what you think :)** _


	4. Chapter 4

_**Hey guys! So I was able to write this before I left for my cottage! However, school starts in less than a week and it's my grade 12 year so I'll be pretty busy. I will try to update as much as possible, but the updates won't be as fast as they are now. **_

_**Anyways this is the next chapter, hope you like it! :)**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Castle.**_

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_"I remember, Castle. I remember everything..."_

Castle looked at her disbelieving and stepped back from her.  
"You remember? For how long now?" He asked softly.

"Since the shooting...I never forgot." Kate replied, her eyes searching his for any hint of how he was feeling.

"Y-you never... You lied to me for nearly a year?!" Castle exclaimed, anger clearly evident in his voice.

"Yes. But Castle please listen to me! I-" Kate pleaded but was interrupted by Castle.

"Listen to you?! How am I even supposed to trust anything you say? A year, Kate! I asked you on multiple occasions and each time you lied straight to my face!" Castle yelled and began to walk away.

"Castle please. Please don't walk away. Just give me a chance to explain. Don't throw everything that's happened between us away now. Let me explain...let me fix this. Please." Kate begged.

Castle didn't say anything, but he stopped walking, so Kate took that as a signal to continue.

"Okay, yes Castle I remember. But the thing is I wasn't ready to hear those words yet. I wasn't ready to accept them or deal with them. I had just been shot. My world had turned upside down. I couldn't cope with anything then.  
Along with my physical therapy, I had to be cleared by a therapist before I came back. After he cleared me, I decided to continue seeing him because I wanted to fix myself. I was broken. I wanted to be whole. I wanted to be worthy."

"Worthy for what?" Castle interrupted, curiosity getting the better of him.

"Worthy for you." Kate breathed. "I wanted to be with you Castle. But I wanted to be ready first. I wanted to be enough so I could finally be deserving someone as great as you.  
That wall I was telling you about? It's gone. All that's left is crumbles at my feet, and I have you to thank for that.  
So yes, I lied Castle, because I wasn't ready at that time. But I am now. I'm ready to dive in this with you. I just want you." Kate finished, looking up at him with watery eyes.

Castle didn't say anything for a while. He just went to sit on the arm rest of his couch. He didn't look up at her, he stared down at the floor. Moments later he began.

"I-I just need some time Kate. I need some time...alone." He sighed, but there was still a hint of anger and hurt in his voice.

Kate couldn't stop the tears that now escaped when she heard him.  
She just nodded, even though he wasn't looking. She retreated back to his bedroom to get her clothes.

A few minutes later she emerged and looked over to where was Castle was. He hadn't moved. She didn't say anything, just made her way towards the door. Right before she was about to leave, she turned back and called his name.

"Castle?" She waited until he looked up at her.

"I-I never meant to hurt you." And with that she left the loft.

Castle had just stared at the door after she left. He then got up, changed his clothes, and made his way to his office. He sat down, with his elbows on his desk and heels of his hands pressed into his eyes.  
_How could this have happened? He thought. Everything was going perfectly until minutes ago. Ugh why were things always so difficult between them?!_

* * *

Kate had just hailed a cab back to her apartment. When she got to her place she immediately went to change into a pair of sweat pants and one of Castle's red t-shirts that he let her borrow when her old apartment blew up. She curled up on her couch, hugging a pillow to her chest and crying. She couldn't help it. She had to go and screw everything up, just like always. She definitely didn't deserve a man like Richard Castle, she thought to herself.

* * *

Back at the loft, Castle had stayed at his desk, replaying the last few days in his head. His thoughts were interrupted when his mother walked in.

"Richard I'm home. I- what's wrong?" Martha asked, concern written all over her face when she looked at her son.

"Nothing mother, I just want to be alone." Castle sighed.

"Oh darling. There is only one person who can make you look like that. What happened with Katherine? I thought your date went well?" Martha prodded.

"It did, it's just- she came over to the loft last night for another date. Everything was great, we made pizza, drank wine, watched a movie...and she ended up spending the night..." Castle said, not going into any more detail of what happened that night. "And things this morning started off great as well. We were just about to make breakfast, and I got caught up in the moment and I told her I loved her. But she didn't respond the way I expected. She said she already knew, because she remembered everything from the shooting..." He trailed off.

"Ahhh, I see." Martha said, understanding. "And what did she say while explaining?"

Castle retold his mother everything Kate had said to him.

"So...do you believe her?" Martha asked knowingly.

"Yes! Except her not being worthy enough or not deserving me. That's just crazy. She's more than worthy. She deserves the world. It should be the other way around, I don't deserve her." Castle said.

"Well if you believe her, and believe all that. Then why are you not with her right now?" Martha said.

"Because she lied, mother! She lied to me for nearly a year. I asked her several times and she continued to lie to me!" Castle exclaimed.

"Yes, Richard. She did lie to you. But she didn't do it to hurt you. She did it for you, for both of you. She did it so she could heal herself and be ready to start something with you. You were always in her best intentions."

"She should have told me mother! I would have waited for her." Castle said.

"I know you would, darling. And she knew you would too. But can you imagine how that would be for her. Knowing that your relationship depended on when she was ready." Martha said.

Castle stayed quiet. Understanding and taking in everything his mother had said.  
"So what do I do?" Castle asked.

Martha sighed dramatically. "Go and get her Richard! Explain to her and work things out."

"But I told her I need time." Castle said in a defeated tone.

"Time?! Richard, you both have waited 4 years for this! Don't waste anymore time! You love her, so go show her!" Martha exclaimed.

Castle didn't waste any more time. He grabbed his keys and rushed out the door.

* * *

20 minutes later he was outside Kate's door. He knocked and moments later she opened the door.

"Castle? What are you doing here?" She asked surprised.

Castle looked at her and saw the tear stains on her face and immediately guilt surged through his body. He hated the fact that he was the cause for those tears.

"Can I come in?" Castle asked tentatively.

She nodded and stepped aside, opening the door wider. When she closed it she turned to him.

"I thought you said you need time?" Kate asked softly.

"I know what I said, but I'm an idiot, Kate. And while I am still a little hurt that you lied to me, I understand why. You did it for us." Castle said.

Kate was quiet for a while, not looking at him. She turned around slightly and stared at the floor.

"I don't deserve you, Castle. Especially not after this." Kate said softly, hearing the tremble in her voice.

Castle immediately walked closer and turned her towards him. She still wasn't looking at him, so he gently titled her chin up so she was looking at him.

"Hey, stop it. You are worth so much more than you know. You deserve everything and more, Kate. You are truly extraordinary, and I'm lucky enough to even be a part of your life. So don't you think any different." Castle said gently, yet firmly.

He didn't let her speak though. He just leaned in and kissed her softly. Their mouths did a delicate dance as they poured out all their feelings for one another.

When they pulled away, Kate wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for an embrace, burying her face in his neck.

"I'm so sorry, Castle." Kate sobbed and Castle just held her tighter and kissed the side of her head.

"Shhh, it's okay, Kate. I know." He coaxed her.

She pulled away enough to look at him, and smiled.

"So are we okay?" She asked.

"We're great." He said with a big smile and gave her a quick peck.

He waited a few moments before he continued.

"So, was this our first couple fight?" He asked.

"Uh...yeah I guess. why?" Kate said, confused.

"Does that mean we get to have make-up sex?" Castle asked slyly.

Kate laughed, but the replied in a serious tone. "Yes. But there is one more problem."

"What? What is it?" Castle asked nervously.

"I still haven't gotten breakfast yet." Kate said while biting her lip.

Castle laughed and pulled her in closer with his arms still wrapped around her waist. He kissed her and he could feel her smile, which made him smile.

"Leave that up to me, detective. I have the perfect idea." Castle said as he pulled away, and smiled down at her.

* * *

_**So that's probably the most angst you will see in this story. I hope you guys liked it! I know some of you didn't want either of them to walk away, but I thought they needed that time by themselves to reflect and wrap their heads around everything. I'm not sure when I'll update next, but stick with me. **_

_**Let me know what you thought of this chapter! :)** _


	5. Chapter 5

**_Hey guys! I am so so so sorry for the late update. Life got busy! But this is the next chapter. I'm sorry about how short it is and how it's probably shit, I don't like it myself, but I owed you guys something. This chapter has no plot whatsoever, it's just PURE FLUFF! The next chapter will actually have a plot behind it, so don't worry. Again sorry for the late update and crappy chapter, I'll try to update the next one sooner. _**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Castle._**

* * *

When he didn't respond to her question, she tried a different approach.  
"What are you looking for? I might be able to help you since it is _my_ place."

"Do you have a picnic basket by any chance?" Castle asked with hopeful eyes.

Kate studied him for a second with a weary look in her eyes but nonetheless, gave him an answer.  
"Top shelf, in the closet near the door." She said as she pointed to it.

Castle didn't say anything. He quickly made his way to the destination and retrieved the basket.

"Okay, go change, and then we'll be on our way." Castle said as he made his way back to where she was standing.

"Castle why are we having a picnic? I don't even have any food, I haven't gone grocery shopping in a while." Kate said.

"Oh I know. I saw you styrofoam temple in your fridge. Leave the food to me, I'll set everything up. You just go get dressed...unless you need help with that too, in which case I am 'more' than happy to offer assistance." Castle said slyly with a wink.

Kate just glared at him and walked into her bedroom to change.

When she emerged, she was met with a slack-jawed Castle.

"Castle?" Kate said to get his attention.

"Hmm? What? Oh-sorry...just wow, you look amazing." He replied as he walked towards her, wrapping one arm around her waist, that wasn't occupied by the picnic basket.

She was wearing a simple white, knee length dress with a pair of gladiator shoes, and her hair pulled back in a messy bun.

"Thanks, Rick." Kate said, blushing slightly, but leaning in to give him a kiss.

They broke apart and smiled at each other, resting their foreheads together.

"Okay so we just have to make 2 quick stops on our way to the park." Rick said as he kissed her on the cheek before pulling away and grabbing her hand.

* * *

Their first stop was at a small bakery that Kate had never heard of before.

"Did you call beforehand or do we have to stand in line to order?" Kate asked as they entered the bakery.

"I called when you were getting dressed." Castle said with a smile and made his way over to a man behind the counter.  
"Hi, I'm here to pick up an order for Rick Castle."

"Ah, yup. Here it is. Enjoy your food." Said the man behind their counter while handing them the bag of food.

"Thank you." Rick said, taking the bag and paying the man.

"So what did you order?" Kate asked reaching out for the bag.

Castle put the bag out of her reach, while grabbing the hand reaching out.  
"You'll have to wait to find out." He said with a wink.

Kate pouted.  
"You know Castle, leaving a girl curious and hungry is never a good thing."

Castle laughed while squeezing her hand.  
"I'll make it up to you."

Their next stop was to Magnolia Bakery. When they walked in, Castle went through the same process and retrieved the food.

* * *

"Are we going to central park?" Kate questioned as they got into the car.

"No, a different place. It's not as big but it's a lot less busy." Castle replied.

They arrived to a small meadow. It was surrounded by trees, and in the middle was a single tree, which they made their way over to.

"Wow, this is so peaceful; uncommon for New York." Kate said.

"Yeah, I love it. Alexis and I came across it when she was younger." Castle replied, smiling at her.

He opened the basket and pulled out a blanket. He spread it out on the ground, under the tree. They sat down, opposite each other with the basket in between them.

"Okay let's see what's in there! I'm hungry!" Kate said eagerly.

Castle chuckled.  
"Okay well to drink, I got lemonade." He said while pulling out a thermos and 2 cups.  
"For lunch I got us chicken wraps and Caesar salad."  
"And last, but certainly not least, I got us dessert. I got banana bread pudding and chocolate covered strawberries!" Castle said excitedly.

They ate their lunch while talking, laughing and stealing kisses, here and there.

"Okay, time for dessert!" Castle said like a little kid on Christmas morning.

They started with the banana bread pudding. This was Kate's first time trying it. At first she didn't think it sounded very appetizing, but after one bite, she loved it.  
Between the two of them, they finished the banana bread pudding fairly quickly, moving on to the chocolate covered strawberries.

"Open up." Castle instructed, guiding a strawberry into Kate's mouth.

"No, Castle you are not feeding me. That's so cliché!" Kate said.

"Come on, pleaseeeee!" Castle begged while pouting.

"No." Kate said flatly.

"Kate pretty please? We never do anything like normal couples. Can't we do just this one thing?!" Castle said, giving Kate his best puppy dog looked.

Kate glared at him before finally giving in. She could never say no to that face.  
"Fine. Just this once."

Castle's face lit up with an eye crinkling smile. He then guided the strawberry, once again, to her mouth.

Kate opened her mouth and bit down on the strawberry, moaning at the taste.  
"Ugh, gosh Castle these strawberries are to die for! You have to taste it!"

Castle didn't say anything, he just stared at her with darkened eyes. Before Kate knew what was happening, Castle's lips were on hers.

He kissed her passionately, forcing his tongue into her mouth and exploring, tasting the combination of the chocolate, strawberry, and a unique flavour that could only be described as Kate Beckett.

After, what felt like hours, he finally pulled back. They took a few moments to catch their breath before speaking again.

"Wow, you were right. Those are really good." Castle said with a smile.

"Yeah well there's a lot more. Have another one." Kate said, slyly.

"Oh, I plan on it." Castle said as leaned forward and captured her lips once again.  
This time he gently pushed her so she was lying on her back and he hovered over her.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, and one leg hooked his calf. He rested one of his legs in between hers, and rested his weight on his forearms.

They continued to kiss, with not a care in the world, completely wrapped up in one another.

* * *

_**I'll try to update soon! Thanks for reading :)** _


	6. Chapter 6

_**Hey guys! Sorry for the late update, I've been really busy! But here's the next chapter in honor of Castle returning tonight! I'm so excited for it, I can't wait! We survived the Castle Hiatus! Anyways, I hope you guys like this one :) **_

* * *

_During 47 Seconds, Beckett's in interrogation with Bobby Lopez_

Castle had just brought Kate a cup of coffee when Espo told him that they caught a suspect and Beckett was in the box with him. Castle made his way over to the observation room; there was no point in him joining Beckett when she was in the middle of an interrogation.

Castle looked through the window, examining Beckett's every move. She never failed to impress him when she was in this mode; even though he's watched, joined, and experienced her interrogating skills.

He zoned out for a while thinking about Kate, that happened a lot, more than now that they were together. He started listening to Bobby giving some lame excuse of not remembering what happened because of the trauma. Beckett snapped at that, saying he didn't get to use that excuse because he didn't know trauma, she did, and that's when she said it...  
"I was shot in the chest and I remember every second of it."

That hit Castle, hard. He didn't know why though, he knew that she remembered, they had that conversation already so why was he so taken back from it?

He was opening an old wound, remembering something that should not be thought of again. His guess was that he never really had that proper time to let everything sink in, to learn how to deal with it. When Kate told him that she remembered, he said he needed time, but in the end he went to get her because he thought they wasted enough time. He doesn't regret it, he never regrets anything when it comes to Kate, because everything that happened, everything they've been through, brought them together and he's never been happier.  
So this just brought back bad memories that he'd rather not remember. He knew he was being silly, he wasn't angry with her, it's just that hearing she remembered brought back all the feelings he felt the first time.

Instead of staying here and concerning Kate with his change in mood, he decided it would be best to just go home for the rest of the day and cool down.

* * *

When Kate got out of the interrogation room, she made her way to her desk. She noticed the coffee, and knew that it was Castle...but where was he? She decided to text him, so she pulled out her phone and typed the message.

**Hey! Thanks for the coffee :) where did you head off to?**

A few minutes later, she received a reply.

**Sorry, I was struck with some inspiration so I went home to do some writing**

No jokes, sly comments, or anything from Castle? That's peculiar, Kate thought. She decided not too think much into it, he was probably busy writing.

**Oh, okay. See you later?**

**Sure. Good luck with the case.**

Something was up with him, Kate thought. But right now she had to focus on the case, so she put her phone away and turned her attention back to the murder board.

* * *

They closed the case at around 6pm that evening. The captain told everyone to go home early and get some well deserved rest. Kate didn't hesitate, she decided to pick up some dinner and surprise Castle at his place.

About 45 minutes later, she was knocking on Castle's door. He opened it with a surprise look.

"Kate, hi. I didn't know you were coming by."

"Hey. Yeah I thought I'd surprise you. I brought dinner" Kate said, holding up the bag of Chinese food.

"Oh..you shouldn't have, but thanks. Come in" Castle said when he realized they were still standing at his door.

Kate stepped in, stopping in front of Castle, leaning in for a kiss. He gave her a quick peck on the lips, then took the bag of food from her and made his way to the kitchen.  
Kate just stood there in the same spot. That was weird, usually he greeted her with a much more passionate and enthusiastic kiss which had them gasping for breath.  
There was definitely something going on.

"So how'd the writing go?" Kate asked as she made her way to the kitchen.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah. It was fine." Castle replied.

"Did you get a lot done?" Kate asked

"Yeah, some." Castle said, busying himself with the containers of food.

Castle was acting strange. He was being quiet and reserved, very un-Castle like.

"Rick? Is everything okay?" Kate questioned

"Yeah, why?" He replied, a little too quickly.

"Well you're just acting different. You're being really quiet, gave me a quick greeting, and you haven't even asked how the case went." Kate said, confused on what could be bothering him.  
Did she do something to upset him? She hardly saw him today, so what could be the problem?

"Oh, right. I'm sorry, I guess my brain is still in the writing mode, I'm not thinking too properly." Castle said, avoiding her gaze.

Kate didn't say anything, she just walked around the kitchen island, and stood behind him, putting her hands on his waist to turn him around. She waited until he looked her in the eyes before she began.

"Rick, seriously. What's going on?"

"It's nothing, Kate." Castle replied unconvincingly.

"You're forgetting that I know you. I thought we agreed to be honest with each other. So tell me what's up?" Kate said

Castle just looked at her, he knew that he wasn't going to get out of this.  
"It's just...I..earlier today, I came to bring you cup of coffee. Then Espo told me you were in interrogation with Bobby Lopez so I went to go watch. While I was listening, I heard you say you remember everything about your shooting, and I guess I was just taken back. I mean I know we talked about it already, but it was like opening up and old wound...it brought back all the feelings from that day."

Kate looked up at him and saw some of the hurt there, the hurt that she caused... God she hated herself.

"Ugh, God Rick, I'm so sorry. I wish I could take it all back. I wish that I was just upfront and honest with you about it. We could've worked through it together, but instead I lied to you for basically a year when you did nothing to deserve that. You waited for me for so long. I should have known that if I told you, you wouldn't have pushed me, you would've continued waiting because that's the kind of man you are. Rick I'm just so sorry, because of me, you're never gonna be able to forget what I did." Kate said, her voice trembling a bit and her eyes looking down.

When Castle heard her shaky voice and saw her glistening eyes, he felt horrible. He never meant to make her feel bad or to bring this up again and rub it in her face. He was just trying to be honest with her.

Castle just wrapped his arms around her and held her.

"Kate, I'm sorry. I never meant to make you feel bad about this. I was just being stupid. I do forgive you, I forgave you a while ago, and I understand why you did it. Just hearing it reminded me of everything. But I'm not blaming you, nor am I mad at you. Let's just forget about it from now onward; it's in the past."

She didn't say anything for a while until he felt her nod against his chest and mumble a quiet "okay".

They continued to hold each other for a few more moments until they pulled back to look at each other. They rested their foreheads together and gazed lovingly into each other's eyes. Kate was the one to break the silence first.

"Okay, so that's it, right? No more secrets between us?" She asked with a smile.

Castle started to smile as well and was about to her agree with her, until he remembered...

The smile fell from his face and his hands dropped to his sides.

"Castle? What is it?" Kate asked with a concerned look on her face.

Castle hesitated for a moment before saying,

"Kate, there's something I have to tell you." He said and grabbed her hand, leading her into his office.

"Castle, what's going on? What is this?"

Castle didn't reply, he silently turned on the TV so she could see the representation of a murder board he made. The murder board about her shooting and her mother's death.

Kate stepped up to the TV, quietly examining it. He was about to say something until she spoke.

"Castle...how could you?" She said softly, her voice cracking because of the hurt.

"Kate, just hear me out, please. Let me explain." Castle pleaded.

Kate turned towards him slowly, with her bottom lip caught between her teeth and her eyes filled with water.  
"Tell me everything." She demanded

So Castle retold her the entire story, about the file, Michael Smith, and everything else he found out.

* * *

"...And that's all I have so far. But Kate, I am so sorry. I didn't do this to betray you, I did it to protect you. I didn't want you getting hurt or worse. I couldn't watch you throw your life away. I watched you die once, and that was more than enough." Castle said

Kate just stood there, bracing herself against his desk, looking to the floor.

"Castle, you shouldn't have done this. It wasn't your place to do it."

That's when Castle got mad.

"Wasn't my place?! The hell it wasn't, Kate! You're my partner, my best friend! I watched you die in that ambulance, did you know that? Do you know what it's like to watch the life drain out of the person you love?! It's horrible Kate!  
I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier, but I'm not sorry for doing it, not if it keeps you safe!"

"Keep me safe? What about you Rick?! What about your life and your family? Do you know how they would feel if something happened to you? Do you know how _I_ would feel if you got hurt? I wouldn't be able to get over it, Rick. You mean too much to me. I have never cared for someone this much, I've never loved somebody this much, so you can't leave me! You can't-"  
She was cut off my Castle's lips.

He kissed her, he kissed her hard. He wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her tightly against him. It took her a few moments before she began to respond, she couldn't help it, he had that affect on her. They kissed passionately, pouring out all their feelings for one another, with tears still streaming down their faces. When air finally became a necessity, they pulled away.

Castle lifted his hand to wipe the tears on her face. He rested his forehead against hers and whispered,  
"I'm so sorry, Kate. For everything. But I can't lose you either. I will do anything if it means protecting you and keeping you safe."

Kate just nodded, taking in everything he just said.  
"Just promise me that we'll do this together from now onward. We'll do it the right way and be safe about if?" Kate asked

"I promise" replied Castle, earnestly. "And Kate?"

"Hmm?" She replied

"I love you." He said, looking into her eyes.

Kate smiled, "I love you, too."

* * *

_**Sorry for the length, I know it's a bit short! But let me know what you think! **_

_**CASTLE IN 30 MINUTES! Brace yourselves for the season premiere**_


End file.
